Michael, could this be you?

Dev

Dev

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The other day I was cruising along as usual in my BMW coming onto one of my motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.

First off, I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow
down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip road! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! (The driver of the car behind me did realise his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn.)

Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get to the BMW lane. (Why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?)

Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110mph enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane of my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70 mph!

Naturally, I got to within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.

Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back out behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I would out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get onto the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.

Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast!

Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my driver's licence to a Police Station to be sent away to have some points put on! (They're not free points either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed 3.) But the man at the Police Station said that because I drive a BMW, it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me!

Now THAT's the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW!:bmw:
 
Originally posted by julian2002
ommmmmm, ommmmmmm, ommmmmmmm.

must.. bite.... tongue....
cheers


julian.
Click to expand...

Julian..


C'mon.. admit it.. you see the funny side of it too.....:p
(even if it is obvioulsy just another example of stereotyping).


I thought it was funny..:D but then I don't drive a BM.. but even if I did.... I don't drive like that so I'd still find it humorous.. because I've seen so many other people that do.

GTM
 
Originally posted by julian2002
ommmmmm, ommmmmmm, ommmmmmmm.

must.. bite.... tongue....
cheers


julian.
Click to expand...

Why???

You guys already know I also drive a BMW (but not in this manner obviously), so it's not a wind up, just a laugh really. ;)
 
Very amusing Dev :D I've recently been enjoying my M3 on a driving holiday of Portugal. Had a lot of fun and also learnt a lot more about how it drives. It's amazing acceleration (and therefore overtaking ability) never ceases to amaze me. The roads of the Portuguese mountain region "Serra de Estrela" and the beautiful Alentejo wine and olive growing region are surprisingly good. The mountain roads are nearly all beautifully surfaced and properly banked in the corners :)

Michael.
 
dev,
i know you also drive one of these vulgar vehicles however i didn;t want to stereotypicly go off on one. however.... michaels quote about the overtaking ability is one step away from the stereotypical view of the bmw driver always looking to get in front, tailgating and overtaking on blind hills and corners. not that i'm saying this of michael or yourself just that owning one of these machines will poison your mind. the first symptoms of which we are seeing in michael :D ;)
cheers

julian

p.s. i lmfao at the origional post
 
Julian,

I drive a lowly 320 automatic not an M3 but someone at work sent me an email containing the original post. I thought it was funny and posted it here. I must take issue with you calling these cars vulgar. The reputation is due to certain type of drivers rather than cars (which are grrrrrrrreat - in my opinion anyway). Long may BMW continue to make them.

Why don't you test drive one?, try a second hand one to see how well made they are, you might even start to like them.
 
The reputation is due to certain type of drivers rather than cars
Click to expand...

Nothing wrong with the cars (apart from the aesthetics of the new models), its the rather high percentage of idiot drivers that are the problem and their reputation. Put me off buying one anyway.

In any case I am more of a comfort and refinement guy which is why I bought the merc, it's probably better for what I want.
 
Originally posted by Robbo
Nothing wrong with the cars (apart from the aesthetics of the new models)
Click to expand...

I quite like the new 5 Series and the Z4 for that matter but it'll probably be labelled a hairdressers car:mad:
 
dev,
about 4 years ago i was shopping arround for a new coupe. amongst others i tried the then new shape 328ci. the things that put me off were, the attitude of other drivers towards me, pulling out of a junction or a roundabout in a brand new bmw is not a quick or easy thing. the cabin was cramped and the seat was uncomfortable (those that know me will understand... i'm not a small guy), i kept hitting my elbow on the door. equipment levels were sparse unless you raided the options list. the looks were bland and for a sports coupe this is not a good thing. handling and acceleration were good and the electric rear windows were kind of cool but in the end i went for something else.

beemers do seem to attract a certain type of driver and while i realise this is not always the case it often is.

the 5 series is a decent car but i'd take a jag or lexus instead thankyou very much. the z4 is fugly in the extreme it may be a fast and handle well but give me an elise (if id's fit) or a honda s2000 instead please.

the best car bmw made imo was the m635 csi, good looking, comfortable, bloody fast and expensive or old enough to attract enthusiasts rather than wannabes or idiots.
cheers

julian
 
It also happened to me, but I was driving a friend's Porsche. I was a racer when I was younger... That was my only excuse to my friend...

I used to drive very hard up to my 40th birthday. I used to impress girls that way, chiefly in mountain roads. Then I married. My wife loves when I drive fast (powerslides and all), but somewhow it doesn't seem that fun. I'm probably loosing my reflexes, and the adrenalin just doesn't come as fast as it used to do. Old age....:( .

I can still drive a powerful go kart full throtle and get away with it - powerslides and all - and post very good lap times, but I feel utterly ridiculous. I'm a big man, the kart is so small, and where others see thrill I see danger (I do overcome it, but I don't see it as fun, only as a stupid thing to do). I also get very tired after about five laps on a longish circuit. I can't stand a whole race any longer. I'm gettting on, no doubt about it.

Is there a smiley for :oldman:? It would come in handy.:rolleyes:
 
Originally posted by julian2002
dev,
[...] or a honda s2000 instead please. [...]

julian
Click to expand...

Couldn't agree more: a wonderful car, but when you stress it hard the rear comes away rather suddenly and you have to powerslide it. Not one for amateurs, I think. As a sportscar it is one of the best - the very best being, of course, the wonderfully progressively oversteering Porsches.
 
rds,
the s2000 is definately one of those cars i'd have in my alternate reality life... you know the one where i'm rich, single and childless. unfortunately i'm skint, separated and a single parent so i guess not.

i assume that you are talking about the 924 / 944 / 968 porsches? i'd hardly call any but the latest 911's progressively oversteering. more like bite your arm off at the ankles, poo your pants scary when it comes to a wet autumn corner and the new ones only escape thanks to some clever traction / stability control electronics.

personally i'm not a big fan or porsche or ferrari for that matter - although a 928 s4 is another of those cars that on the 'one day' list along with a maserati bi-turbo, aston db 7 and a bentley turbo r. of course i have little chance of ever owning these cars but i can dream.

cheers

julian
 
Julian:

Yes, progressively oversteering may be a bad way of describing it. The rear really snaps away, but as the engine is at the back, the correction is, in a way, easier. That is because;

a) You usually get oversteer at the beggining of corners, under braking, when the rear is very light;

b) if you then carefully apply power the weight is transfered to the rear wheels, which allows you to progressively control the oversteer - a powerslide.

With the Honda, if you go in fast, you're likely to get a certain amount of understeer (which is easier to control - you just turn the wheels a little deeper into the inside. But when you apply the power it seemed relatively easy to loose the rear end and that happens rather suddenly. It is still easier to drive a Honda than a Porsche and I agree, it would be in my shortlist in the other life.

I don't like Ferraris either - the old Dino being an exception -, but that's because I consider then to be drug dealers's cars. I never drove one myself, but watching them race, the more common ones seem to be rather easy to control, but they seem to me to be best driven cleanly, straight over the trajectory.

Now a Maserati is another thing altogether. Never drove one myself, but it seems a beast to handle but so much fun!

But well, we are day dreaming, of course. I might find the money for an S2000, but I have much more important things to spend it on. For instance, double the cost of an S2000 and you can get yourself a very nice pipe organ, which actually fits a large living room...
 
Never driven a Porsche (of any type) allthough I've often hankered after a 911 of some description. Current (sensible) favourite would be a 993 (last air cooled 911) - probably the 3.8L RS.

However, I have always been a huge Ferrari fan (both in F1 and of their road and race cars) so I always hankered after one. I was lucky enough to own one for a while (a 1992 Mondial T cabriolet) and it was absolutely wonderful :) Being the "T" version it had the transverse gearbox and longtitudinal 3.4L V8 (identical to the one in the 348). Since its wheelbase was longer than the 348 it cured some of the tricky on the limit handling issues with the 348 (which was very tricky in the dry and just evil in the wet). It still didn't prevent me from spinning my Mondial in the wet a couple of times :shame: (no harm done though).

I've had the opportunity to drive the 355 on tracks on several occasions and I have to say it's handling is just beautiful in comparison. So much easier to drift :)

When I moved to Portugal I had to lose the Ferrari - it just isn't practical on Portuguese roads (bumpy and full of holes) - the ground clearance was pathetic. So, I traded it in for my current M3 Cabrio which I have to say I love to bits. It's a lot easier to live with and far more practical as an everyday car and it's just as fast and, I have to say, handles a lot better aswell. Oh, it's just a little bit cheaper to run aswell :D

Now I know that purists will scoff at cabrios but I've always had a convertible since 1994 when I got hooked on the Mazda MX-5 I had in the US. Driving around the Serra de Estrela mountains in Portugal a couple of weeks ago on holiday with the roof down in glorious sunshine just reconfirmed why I love them. OK, so you might not get the last ounce of handling compared to a coupe but it's just sooooo much more enjoyable :)

Michael.
 
You have not lived until you have driven a Lada specialy a 1.2 litre one. All that rusian thick guage steel, a 1964 Fiat 124 chasis and body and a russian clone of an engine. I drove my dads once, the clutch was horrible and heavy, the steering was almost none existance, and suspension didn't appear to do anything. I remember my dad doing 60mph on this slip road in and the car nearly fell of the road it was that bad at handeling.

He said it was almost as bad as a Morris Marina but not quite. The nicest car I have been would have to be my uncles 1989 BMW 750i, I was very young when he had this car so I can't really remember, incendently he drives a Skoda now. :D
 

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